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Thursday, November 16, 2017

King of Cups - Creativity and Compassion

I often draw the King of Cups. There is a implicit message here in this card for me, that until now, I've missed. The two primary words used when describing this card are creativity and compassion, that both have evoked and created a kind of vision quest for me throughout my life.

Over the years my understanding and exploration of how I defined what both of these words meant to me  in relation to myself, to others and to the God of my understanding, began for  at an early age, for reasons that perhaps are not fully revealed to me

I was told as an adult, by an astrologer who read my chart, that it was extremely important for me personally, to find my spiritual purpose in life in order to find a deep happiness. This has certainly been born out and because it has long been my focus, through creativity and compassion, especially toward myself, this greatly helped me to find my purpose, mission, and define my vision for living life.

The road was often not an easy one at all, filled with loss, struggles and temptations, after trying unsuccessfully to fill that hole in the soul, that came with the territory along the path on the journey of self-growth.

In retrospect, I wouldn't change a thing, because these experiences have made me the person I am. Today I continue on the path to creativity and compassion, learning important life lessons along the way, and very gratefully, this has helped me to patch up and heal that hole in my soul, restoring the emotional balance that the King of Cups reflects.

Friday, November 10, 2017

The Empress - Motherhood - Earth - Practical Wisdom

I believe the reason I love the Empress so much is because when I think of who she is, I want to do everything I can to feel grounded to the earth, seeking the practical wisdom she is known for, and she prompts me to work at having a strong sense of discernment to make the right decisions. I'm reminded to trust my intuition and to apply the practical wisdom that the sacred feminine exemplifies.

Last night I had a visitor from a neighbour who has made me an offer, hard to refuse. No, nothing untoward or unseemly, but a business offer that left me feeling a little excited, almost giddy, nervous and thinking about the old adage, 'be careful what you pray for', because your prayer might be answered, and then what will you do?

Oh, I could say yes, I could say no. The pros to saying yes, could really change my life for the better, and be a very practical solution, relieving me of two major problems I've struggled with for many years.

One the other hand, what were the cons? I couldn't see any, as these were unknown, other then what was vaguely in my worrying imaginings.  And I'd say this is what made me fearful, the unknown. The thought of either answer left me feeling anxious, like I was in a kind of state of paralysis, not knowing what to do. I did know I couldn't make any decision in haste.
So I thought, the best thing for me to do would be to take a deep breath, turn it over to the God of my understanding, pray and I drew the Empress card with a question in mind.

 I knew I needed to call a friend today, who's opinion I greatly respected and trusted, and who possessed the practical wisdom of the Empress, a very grounded a very motherly kind of woman, whom I love very much. Calling her to ask what she thought, wasn't the first thing I did this morning, I simply continued with my usual morning rituals and routine to help me get grounded.

Finally, when I felt it was time, I called my friend this afternoon, who thought this offer was something I should say yes to, as it could be a very positive event in my life, and make things so much easier for me.  And she had good things to say about my neighbour. I felt in my heart and in my mind that she was right and I might not ever get another opportunity like this in the future.

So tonight I called my neighbour and asked if we could meet this Sunday to discuss the matter further and hopefully work out some of the initial details and come to a mutual agreement that we were both happy with based on practical wisdom.

Sunday, November 5, 2017

King of Cups - Orpheus

I've heard it said, only the wounded healer can heal and who we find within ourselves.

The representation of water depicted in the King of Cups symbolizes the overt search for relationships to guide and help others.

The Mythic figure of Orpheus is embodied in this card, who was priest, healer, poet, musician and truly, a creative soul. Sadly he seemed destined for unhappiness meeting an untimely end as the wounded healer, having a great compassionate and empathetic heart, toward every living thing and yet couldn't heal the wounds of his own heart. I believe many of us have aspects of this wounded healer embodied in our personality, and we need to learn to heal ourselves.

This kind of individual is often characteristic of the personality in the helping professions, or is simply found among many, whom for what ever reason seem to care for others more than themselves, and can't trust life quite enough to take it's course.

A timely card today, as I think about how difficult it is for many of us to completely trust in the goodness of the Universe when we witness so much suffering all around us, perhaps in the form of broken relationships, either through resentment, or separation through death, leaving us angry, and questioning why. It can be a challenge to find our way back to some kind of emotional stability.

I may no longer be the kind of wounded healer who can't heal all of her wounds, but I do have a wounded faith.

Thursday, October 26, 2017

Nine of Cups - I Wish...I Hope

Today after spending a restless night, I intentionally sought out some kind of message of comfort, from whatever card I drew this morning, because I've been feeling so sad. It's been a difficult couple of months emotionally with the loss of a long time friend and another dear friend, now in palliative care.

Considering this card, the Nine of Cups it is the best one I could draw, as it's the wish card, representing fruition, comfort and satisfaction.

The truth is, we can make wishes all we want but it doesn't change reality regardless of what is happening in our lives and in the lives of those we love so much. So I don't spend my time wishing. Of course I wish things were different, but they're not and there's nothing else I can do but find a place of acceptance, and forgiveness and instead of wishes, I hope and pray for acceptance of situations that I struggle very much with, because they're so unacceptable. I know I have to let go and trust that the God of my understanding will do what I can't do myself, in order to find the way.

Sunday, October 22, 2017

Seven of Wands - Faith - Trust - Perseverance

Seven of Wands depicts a chaotic struggle. And it is, however order often comes out of chaos. It's been my experience that when surrender my ego to regularly working hard at applying my faith, perseverance, and prayer to my life, doesn't necessarily mean my chaos disappears, but I know I'm much more apt to be able to not simply cope. I begin to move past whatever my struggles are. I grow beyond a survival mode and excel into a thriving mode.

Mostly what I've struggled with in the past and even in my present day to day circumstances is not the struggle I'm having with "The Man" as the 60s adage goes, but it's the fight I'm having more often than not, with myself and my ego.

Saturday, October 14, 2017

King of Cups - My Burnt Potato

Today on my walk in the countryside, the Autumnal fragrances were intoxicating. The woodland, the earth, and the burning wood smoke, made me think of the days when these smells blended with the scent of the horse I'd ride this time of the year. It's was my idea of heaven on earth.

When you burn your potato in the microwave, like I did the other night, that's the end of that potato, but that smell hovers in the air for days, and it's really awful, an experience I'd rather forget, and I'll definitely avoid doing again in the future.

Smell is a sense that resonates deep in the memory of days gone by, of past relationships beginnings and endings. You suddenly find yourself in the present and you wonder what does this all mean? And ask, why am I here in this situation? It can be very confusing.

The sensitive, sympathetic, creative and poetic musician, the wounded healer, King of Cups thinks about this. He's lost emotionally, but more than willing to go above and beyond in extending his kind hand and heart; empathetic toward others, but can't seem to heal his own wounded heart. He's unable to achieve the fulfilling relationship which is so desired. He often loses the very thing he most desires.

The King of Cups never relinquishes control, as he doesn't ultimately trust the world of the unconscious, which he can't see.  He's enthroned in water, but can't submerge himself for fear of drowning, which is a metaphor for one letting go, or surrendering to another.

Many of us feel the same way the King of Cups does, not quite trusting life enough to take it's course, because we've been wounded through personal relationships, often those with parents; and we form relationships where we remain in control, and can't be that deeply hurt again.

By remaining in control, we cheat and short change ourselves. This King of Cups is rather like that old burnt potato in the microwave, burnt, wounded, with little to no purpose. We are unable to find happiness within ourselves, and are unable to be born before we die.

If I didn't Have Your Love - Leonard Cohen

 If the sun would lose its light And we lived an endless night And there was nothing left that you could feel That's how it would be What my life would seem to me If I didn't have your love to make it real If the stars were all unpinned And a cold and bitter wind Swallowed up the world without a trace Ah, well that's where I would be What my life would seem to me If I couldn't lift the veil and see your face And if no leaves were on the tree And no water in the sea And the break of day had nothing to reveal That's how broken I would be What my life would seem to me If I didn't have your love to make it real If the sun would lose its light And we lived in an endless night And there was nothing left that you could feel If the sea were sand alone And the flowers made of stone And no one that you hurt could ever heal Well that's how broken I would be What my life would seem to me If I didn't have your love to make it real

Saturday, October 7, 2017

Page of Cups - Good News!

This is the second Page I've drawn in two days. Messages of encouragement, clarity and transformation are very welcomed for sure!

Sometimes it's difficult to be hopeful, sensitive, helpful and loyal when we're struggling and can result in tunnel vision or we become myopic, seeing our problems only and focusing solely on ourselves. We might even feel after a loss, or a painful life experience that we've nothing to give anyone. It's been my experience that there's nothing more helpful to me, than reaching out to those who are also struggling.

Help can come in so many forms, and the smallest of kindnesses should never be minimized, as it can mean all the difference to someone else, bringing them happiness, perhaps save a life, that might even be our own.

There's a powerful and beautiful synchronicity that happens when we're in this situation, reaching out to others in difficulty, in that we help ourselves in the process, by giving to another in whatever way possible. When we pay it forward this generosity is hopefully passed on to another, who will in turn, pay it forward.

Moving away from self-preoccupation, to having an awareness of others, is a self-sacrifice that can creatively transform our lives, and that's the good news!